[Verse 1]
Yo, row seven kickin' off, the basement drops the bass,
Francium, eighty-seven, rarest thing in outer space,
Half a life of twenty-two minutes, then it's ghost,
Ephemeral like a text you send then wish you never sent, dawg, it's toast,
Alkali metal bottom shelf, heaviest of the clan,
Found in trace like a whisper, can't hold it in your hand,
French folks strut down boulevards, collars poppin', chest out proud,
That's the mnemonic, baby, "French" is ringin' loud.
[Chorus]
French Rats Act, French Rats Act,
Eighty-seven, eight, and nine, that's a solid fact,
Francium's the Frenchman, Radium's the Rat,
Actinium's the Act, and that row seven's kicked off flat,
French Rats Act, say it twice so it don't slip,
Fr, Ra, Ac ridin' shotgun on this trip.
[Verse 2]
Now baby girl steps in, Radium's my name,
Eighty-eight, discovered by the Curies' claim to fame,
Dug her out of pitchblende, glowin' effulgent green,
Painted watch dials pretty till they learned what that glow means,
Alkaline earth royalty, sits right below barium,
Bones absorb her sneaky, that's the tragic scenario,
Rats scamper through the sewer, quick and slick and low,
Radium's the rat that glows wherever shadows go.
[Verse 3]
Duet time, Actinium struts up next in line,
Eighty-nine, the launch code for the actinide design,
Silvery skin but blue-lit like a nightclub in the dark,
Radioactive shimmer leavin' a phosphorescent mark,
He's the "Act" that opens up the whole backstage of the show,
Fifteen actinides linin' up right after, row by row,
Little sibling looks like lanthanum, close in how they bond,
But he's the curtain-raiser for that heavy zone beyond.
[Chorus]
French Rats Act, French Rats Act,
Eighty-seven, eight, and nine, that's a solid fact,
Francium's the Frenchman, Radium's the Rat,
Actinium's the Act, and that row seven's kicked off flat,
French Rats Act, say it loud, don't be shy,
Fr, Ra, Ac, watch that whole periodic sky.
[Bridge]
(Male) Frenchman vanishes quick, don't blink or he's gone,
(Female) Rat's still glowin' faint after the party's done,
(Both) Act steps center stage, curtain rises on the row,
Period seven's openin' — heavyweight, here we go.
[Chorus]
French Rats Act, French Rats Act,
Fr, Ra, Ac, we snapped that fact,
Frenchman's fleetin', Rat's still gleamin',
Act's the doorway to the actinide dreamin',
French Rats Act, lock it in your head,
Row seven's born where the alkalis bled.
[Outro]
Eighty-seven, eight, nine — say it one more time,
French Rats Act, that's the closin' rhyme,
Francium, Radium, Actinium, done,
Row seven's cracked open, curtain's just begun.