[Verse 1] Vapor pressure drives the molecules up high, Desflurane boils at twenty-three — volatile supply, Partition coefficients split between the blood and gas, Low blood-solubility means induction goes fast, Desflurane, sevoflurane — wash in quick and clean, Isoflurane lingers longer, 0.45 between, The concentration effect fills alveoli first, Second gas effect tags along — nitrous quenches thirst [Chorus] Anestesia, os agentes no ar — MAC é a dose, não pode errar, Konzentration, Blut und Gas, Partition coefficients, first in class, Sevoflurane, desflurane, breathe them in slow, MAC one-point-eight, let the numbers flow, Anestesia — merke dir das gut, Every modifier shifts the cut [Verse 2] MAC values anchor what we know — Age brings it down, hyperthermia makes it grow, Pregnancy drops MAC by forty percent, Opioids, ketamine — the value gets bent, Hyponatremia lowers CNS demand, Neonates peak higher — cerebral bandwidth, unplanned, Volatile agents hit the myocardium hard, Isofl'rane dilates vessels, coronary on guard, Respiratory drive blunted, CO2 climbs the chart, Cerebral vasodilation — ICP plays its part [Chorus] Anestesia, os agentes no ar — MAC é a dose, não pode errar, Konzentration, Blut und Gas, Partition coefficients, first in class, Sevoflurane, desflurane, breathe them in slow, MAC one-point-eight, let the numbers flow, Anestesia — merke dir das gut, Every modifier shifts the cut [Verse 3] Compound A forms in the soda lime with sevo heat, Nephrotoxic threshold — two parts per million, keep it neat, Carbon monoxide blooms from desiccated baralyme, Desflurane and isoflurane — the usual pantomime, Halothane hepatitis, immune-mediated cascade, Enflurane — the seizure ghost from decades past, unmade, Xenon: blood-gas coefficient near one-point-one-four, Hemodynamic ghost — no pressor, no floor [Bridge] Lachgas — Raumexpansion, sei vorsichtig jetzt, Nitrous doubles pneumothorax where no margin's left, Diffusion hypoxia crashes oxygen on wake, B-twelve and methionine synthase — irreversible mistake, PONV climbs, the ozone pays the toll, Low-flow anesthesia — recirculate the whole, O meio ambiente sofre — feche o fluxo, sim, Environmental debt compounds from begin to fim [Chorus] Anestesia, os agentes no ar — MAC é a dose, não pode errar, Konzentration, Blut und Gas, Partition coefficients, first in class, Sevoflurane, desflurane, breathe them in slow, MAC one-point-eight, let the numbers flow, Anestesia — merke dir das gut, Every modifier shifts the cut [Outro] Malignant hyperthermia — ryanodine receptor springs, Volatile triggers plus succinylcholine — calcium floods and sings, Dantrolene, cooling, bicarb, the protocol unfolds, Xenon leaves no carbon trace — that's the future story told, Sevoflurane, desflurane, isoflurane in low-flow, MAC, partition, organ effects — now you know
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